Parenting is a human right
Having children and parenting those children is a human right. People want to become parents for many reasons. All people who want to have children and start a family should be able to do that.
People with disabilities often don’t get the right to parent
People with disabilities often are denied the right to parent. This is especially true of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. Other people might think that our disabilities make us unable to take care of our children. Or, other people might think that we will abuse our children because we are disabled.
People with disabilities might be denied the right to parent through forced sterilization. This is when someone else (like the government or a guardian) forces us to have surgery that makes it so we can’t have children anymore. Or, if we do have children, the government might take our children away from us. The government might say we can’t take care of our children. Or, the government might say that we will abuse our children. In some states, the government can take our children away just because we have a disability. In those states, the government doesn’t even have to show that we couldn’t take care of our children.
In 2012, the National Council on Disability wrote a report called “Rocking the Cradle: Ensuring the Rights of Parents with Disabilities and Their Children.” The National Council on Disability is part of the federal government. Their job is to give advice on disabilities to other parts of the government. The report found that parents with disabilities get their children taken away from them by the government a lot. The report also found that even though the government is supposed to make accommodations for parents with disabilities before it takes away their children, the government often doesn’t do this. Since 2012, some states have passed laws that make it harder for the government to take children away from parents with disabilities. But many states still do not have these laws.
Parents of color with disabilities are even more likely to have their children taken away from them. This is because the child welfare system is less likely to believe parents of color with disabilities can be good parents. The child welfare system is part of the government that deals with making sure parents take good care of their children. The child welfare system is often racist. The child welfare system is often ableist.
For example, the child welfare system often targets Black mothers. This is because the child welfare system does not believe Black women can be good mothers. The child welfare system often takes Black children away from their mothers, even if their mothers did nothing wrong. One study found that even though Black children are only about 13% of the child population, they make up 23% of children in foster care. (Foster care is when a child is taken from their family and put in another home, like with another family or in a group home.) That means Black children are disproportionately represented in foster care.
The child welfare system also often targets Indigenous parents. There is a law saying that the child welfare system should not take Indigenous children from their families and communities. However, the child welfare system often still removes Indigenous children from their families and communities. Indigenous children are often disproportionately represented in foster care. For example, in Alaska, Indigenous children are 30% of the child population but 50% of children in foster care.
This is not right! People with disabilities can be good parents. People of color can be good parents. We shouldn’t have our children taken away from us. We should be allowed to get help parenting our children if we need it.
Getting help with parenting
Some people with disabilities get long-term services and supports (LTSS). LTSS are services that help disabled people live our everyday lives. Some kinds of LTSS are job coaches or in-home helpers. When people get LTSS in their own communities, that is called home and community based services (HCBS). Some parents with disabilities get HCBS. They may need help taking care of their children because of their disability. But because of different laws and rules, support workers who provide HCBS often aren’t allowed to help take care of children.
For example: Eliza is a woman with a disability. Eliza has a child. Eliza needs help feeding her child and washing their clothes. Eliza needs to do these things to take care of her child. But Eliza’s support worker can’t help her with those things. The support worker would get in trouble with their agency if they helped Eliza with her child.
This is wrong! If parents with disabilities need help caring for their children, they should be able to get help. This includes parents who get HCBS. Support workers shouldn’t get in trouble for helping parents with their children. Parents with disabilities deserve the same rights as parents without disabilities to care for their children.
Assistive technology
Assistive technology are items or products that help disabled people live our lives. Some examples of assistive technology are:
- Wheelchairs
- AAC devices
- Braille displays
Parents with disabilities might need assistive technology to help them care for their children. Some examples of assistive technology to take care of children are:
- Changing tables low enough that a wheelchair user can use them
- A monitor that lights up so a Deaf parent can tell when their baby cries
- A baby sling made for someone who only has one arm
Some parents with disabilities can make changes to existing products, like strollers or changing tables, to make them more accessible. But that takes a lot of work. There isn’t a lot of assistive technology for taking care of children available to buy. When there is assistive technology available, it is often very expensive. Medicaid and other health insurance often will not pay for this assistive technology. That means that many parents with disabilities cannot afford to buy assistive technology for taking care of their children.
Marriage penalties
Some people with disabilities who cannot work receive SSI. SSI is a government program that gives money to people with disabilities who cannot work. In some states, disabled people can only get Medicaid or HCBS if they receive SSI.
SSI does not give people very much money. And, if two people on SSI get married, they will get less money from SSI as a couple than they would if they both got SSI separately. This is called a marriage penalty. In some states, couples that don’t get married but live together as if they are married also get a marriage penalty.
If people feel like they can’t get married, or even live with their partner, without losing their SSI, that is bad! That means that people who get SSI can’t make their families the way they want without losing their SSI. It means that people who get SSI might be less likely to have children, even if they want to have children.
What can we do?
ASAN and the National Partnership for Women & Families wrote a paper together about parenting and people with disabilities. In the paper, we made some suggestions for how to make sure all parents with disabilities can care for their children. The suggestions are:
- Make sure that people who work with parents with disabilities know how to support parents with disabilities. This can be people like:
- Doctors and other health care providers
- People who work in the legal system
- People who work in the child welfare system
- Make sure people who work with parents with disabilities build trust with the disability community. This can be people like:
- Doctors and other health care providers
- People who work in the legal system
- People who work in the child welfare system
- Elected officials should make laws protecting people with disabilities against forced sterilization
- Elected officials should make laws protecting people with disabilities’ right to parent our children
- Elected officials should make laws to get rid of the marriage penalty for SSI and Medicaid
- Elected officials should make laws saying that support people can help parents with disabilities with taking care of their children
- Elected officials should make laws so that Medicaid covers treatments to help people get pregnant. Elected officials should also make laws so that Medicaid covers assistive technology to take care of children.